Solitude

Solitude
Everyone Needs a Place to Get Away

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Confusion

Angel sighed, a long deep sigh. She was unsure. About everything with Yin. She stared up at the ceiling of her room as she lied facing upwards from her bed; thoughts rapidly ran across her head. What...was she suppose to do? Or rather, what did she still think about him?

She didn't talk to him that often, ...well she did, but only when his other guy friends were around. When she was left alone with him, she couldn't bear to be in the same room as him. Her attraction towards him turned more intense when they were alone, which was why she always left. Angel had already knocked her head into the wall several times hoping to find a situation or answer, but unfortunately, she just got a bigger headache.

She was suppose to forget him, or go back to friend status with him. Without his knowledge of course. Wait a sec, her mind snapped, what knowledge?! He saw her as a "good friend." She slapped her hands on her eyes as she let out a exasperated noise,...her feelings were one sided. She couldn't seem to remember that.

She peeked through her fingers and thought about what her friends told her. He wasn't good enough for her. He wasn't committed to relationships. He played around. He was just using her. She should move on. Her friends advised what was best for her. But why didn't she take their advice? Instead she had gone deeper and deeper, to the point where she didn't know her own opinion of him anymore. She had been too widely influenced my her friends' thoughts since all of them, didn't want her to be hurt. And that forced her to just not want to think about anything. She had started to eat more sugary foods, boosting her self-confidence, but erasing the part of her which thought so often. She did things more recklessly and thought about the consequences after doing things. She didn't want to think about kissing him, embracing him, touching him, him touching her, she didn't want to think at all when she saw him. Angel was over her head, and she didn't want to deal with it anymore.

1 comment:

  1. tell Angel the best thing to do is keep her self busy with school work and fun fun stuff. an idle mind make crazy thoughts.

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